Dreams Part One

I don't know if I was awake or if I was dreaming, or maybe even both. But in that scene, there were a lot of people at a joyful gathering apparently, but I found myself sitting in a chair, all by myself. Funny, cuz I was having a good time before that particular scene then all of a sudden, I was just an outsider looking in, observing all the people, seeing their smiles but feeling like the emotion behind those smiles was so distant from where I was and who I was. 

Maybe that was a dream, but last night at Victor's house, everyone was drinking, singing, dancing, laughing, and just having a good time. Then the night went on, and soon I found myself sitting on the couch, surrounding by everyone still having fun, yet I felt like I was in my own little bubble, on my phone petting the dog. Even the conversation I was having through BBM seemed so distant, not only because geographically it was, but the feeling and the tone of it all seemed lackluster. Then as I was heading home with a few people, I felt the same deserted aura, and I found myself tearing up at the thought and finally, cried as soon as I laid down. Cried through the first half of my late night shower, then realized that I should just not bring up the things that cause me to feel that way...so I was fine, well kinda.

Then that resembling dream occurred.

***WEIRD