Identity Crisis

See lately, I've been feeling like a nobody.

Wait, hold up...like I'm a somebody unseen and unrecognized by everybody.

Lately, I've been feeling like I have a stolen identity...

My height matches that of a white girl,

My frame? That of an Asian girl

My face looks so damn near a Latina

But I am none of those because I am Filipina

& PROUD OF IT!

But lately,

and every other time someone tries to figure me out

and expose my ambiguity,

I feel my throat gets a lil dryer

my fists clench a lil tighter

and my smile grows a lil weary

Because you asking me that question

Reinforces my insecurities and backs up this society's notion

That everyone should fall in a box

Check here if you're this, check here if you're that

and if you're not, then you find yourself behind locks

that detain you for being different.

For being ambiguous

and for making them feel uncomfortable

that they can't figure you out so their minds become strenuous.

Lately, I've been feeling like an "Other" in a sea of many

I get tired of always having to answer to someone's discomfort in who I am upon meeting me

Like I'm some sort of alien, a savage, a science experiment, a spectacle that they have to see clearly and observe me.

Lately, I've been feeling like I can't be free from the shackles of my identity,

And it has become a crime to expose me

Like my identity has been stolen, taken away from me.

Lately Ive been feeling like a credit card,

Stolen from the wallet,

that has been my security blanket

To keep someone's funds from dehydrating and dying out

Except with me,

There's no hotline I can call and report a missing card with a stolen identity.

There's no police who will arrest the thieves who took advantage of me.

In fact, I'm the one who cannot be freed from the shackles of my individuality

Because I am different, apart from the normality

of someone who is of the same descent as me.

I continue to suffer from stolen identity,

If only there was one phone call away that will put a hold on my funds,

If only there were cops to expose my thief and rescue me...

Then I'll be free.

I was inspired to write a little something [just a freestyle of my thoughts] after I saw this piece on youtube a homie of mine sent. It's nothing like his spoken word piece but I felt like writing :) Anyways, here's the video, so yall can be inspired and see it too!